


STARS ABOVE Side-Story: My Sunshine

by BHS, FreakshowImprov



Series: Stars Above [2]
Category: Lucky Star (Manga), Mahou Shoujo Kazumi Magica | Puella Magi Kazumi Magica, Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magika | Puella Magi Madoka Magica, Mahou Shoujo Oriko Magica | Puella Magi Oriko Magica
Genre: Angst and Tragedy, Canonical Character Death, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Cross-Posted on deviantArt, Crossover, Explicit Language, F/F, Fantasy, Female Homosexuality, Female Protagonist, Female Relationships, Femslash, Five Stages of Grief, Grief/Mourning, Horror, Magical Girls, Moving On, Nightmare Fuel, Shipping, Side Story, Violence, Yuri
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-28
Updated: 2013-10-01
Packaged: 2017-12-27 20:08:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/983088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BHS/pseuds/BHS, https://archiveofourown.org/users/FreakshowImprov/pseuds/FreakshowImprov
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A companion piece to the crossover fic STARS ABOVE. In the early days of the war against Vittoria, Kyoko Sakura returns in shambles from a mission in the wilds of Japan, refusing to speak to anyone... Her fellow Puellae Magi soon learn that her lover and trusted partner, Mami Tomoe, is dead. This is the story of her final days.</p><p>Guest-starring characters from the Kazumi and Oriko spin-offs. Kyoko/Mami. Rated Teen: Violence, angst, strong language, yuri shipping, mature themes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Denial

**STARS ABOVE SIDE-STORY**

**My Sunshine**

By BHS and Forzare

" _You are my sunshine_

_My only sunshine_

_You make me happy_

_When skies are gray_

_You'll never know, dear_

_How much I love you_

_Please don't take my sunshine away"_

_\- Jimmie Davis and Charles Mitchell, 1940_

**PART ONE: DENIAL** _  
_

**February 2012**

**Mitakihara**

Oriko Mikuni felt her coming long before she laid eyes on her. Such was her gift: precognitive visions that could give her brief glimpses of the future. Sometimes those visions were a boon, able to warn against danger and save lives before trouble arose... those were the times she was thankful for her power. And other times, they were a curse… she would _feel_ bad news, churning like acid inside her, before anyone had a chance to deliver it. In those instances, though she remained serene and unflappable on the surface, inside she would hate her ability, hate it like she hated scarcely anything else in her life.

This was one of the latter instances.

This particular omen sent her to the floor, her white satin dress crumpling and pooling around her as she moaned, clutching her temples. Pain… she saw flashes of red hair and felt anguished pain, mixed with livid, boiling rage… something terrible had happened…

Kirika Kure was at her side in a heartbeat. Dust gathered on the knee of her one ragged, striped stocking as she knelt down. "Oriko-sama! What is it, are you okay?"

Poor Kirika. One of the few things that could actually alarm her was the state of Oriko's health. When she was hurt, no matter how minor the injury, Kirika would fly into violent rages that made Demons look amiable, and whoever or _whatever_ caused that injury would be swiftly and summarily dealt with, usually dead within minutes or hours, depending on how sadistic the younger girl felt that day. When she was sick, Kirika would turn into a particularly scary mother hen: forcing meals on her, checking her temperature, changing her sheets, helping her bathe… and refusing to stop until she was absolutely, one-hundred-percent _sure_ her Oriko-sama was feeling better.

"It was a vision," gasped Oriko, trying to control her breathing. "I will recover in a moment, do not worry."

"Another bad one?" Kirika's lower lip stuck out.

The white Puella Magi gave a weak, sad chuckle as the other girl helped her to her feet. "I know. There _have_ been too many of those lately…"

The reason for the recent darkness of her visions was obvious. The remaining Japanese media called it "the Destroyer" or "the Great Disaster", not knowing what else to call it. The Puellae Magi, knowing all too well, had taken to calling it "Mother". Born from one of the two they had tried so hard to protect, even a month later she was still rampaging throughout Japan, leaving a hurricane trail of devastation wherever she went. Mother needed no Lair to hide behind; she was impossibly large now, covering entire city blocks in her shadow. And whenever the Puellae Magi mounted a mission to try to take her down… sometimes the strike teams got away lucky, coming back with only superficial or treatable injuries. Other times… other times it was like what had happened to Kazumi.

Kazumi was the first of a growing number to have their Soul Gems reduced to dead and empty glass shells by Mother's branches. No one could determine how she was doing it, what process it was that could drain the gems of their bearers' very being with just a few seconds' touch. There was no defense against it, no way to halt the leeching of the soul once it begun. It was a hideous thing, seen as twisted and cruel even by the most hardened, jaded Puellae Magi. Even those who hadn't seen it happen, who hadn't been there to watch the roots burrow into the soft flesh of her cheek, who hadn't heard the sickening _thud_ as her body fell to the floor, who hadn't watched the life fade from her wide, childlike eyes… even _they_ still had nightmares, simply from hearing of it.

Kazumi's body had not faded; she was denied even that much dignity. Her friends and comrades had buried her in an unmarked grave on the grounds of the ruined Beatrice Hotel. There had been no question of repairing the place or using it again. The specter of death hung over it like a shroud… no one wanted to stay there. Their operation, such as it was, had been moved back to Mitakihara, now largely abandoned and empty, its residents either evacuated or in hiding. Oriko's own Shirome High School was their headquarters, but the familiarity of the surroundings was of very little comfort, not when almost every day brought a new and terrible glimpse at the future…

Kirika pouted for a moment longer. Then, as if someone had flipped a switch, her face split into a wide and crooked grin, the same expression that gave most of the other Puellae Magi the creeps. "I know! We should go find Asuka and make her cook you something good!" She pounded her fist into her palm. "And if she says no, I'll beat the _shit_ out of her!"

"Language, Kirika," said Oriko, grimacing.

Just like that, she was a meek little child again. "Sorry, Oriko-sama."

"I _would_ like you to locate Asuka-san and Chitose-san, though. Sakura-san and the others are returning, and they may require medical attention."

Impossibly, Kirika grinned even wider as she snapped into a salute. "Right away!" She vaulted over a desk and flew out the classroom door, and soon the pounding of her footsteps receded down the empty hall.

Oriko sighed, smoothed out her dress, and followed as gracefully as she could. Even in trying times, one had to lead by example.

* * *

Moments later, Oriko turned the corner and found the two healers and Kirika waiting in the entrance hall, by the school's front doors. Yuuri Asuka was clearly in a bad mood; it was obvious from the disheveled state of her hair and her wrinkled pajamas that Kirika had literally dragged her out of bed. Little Yuma Chitose needed no such prompting; she never dealt well with being separated from her _onee-chan_ , but she was always ready and waiting whenever she returned, with a box of her adopted big sister's favorite chocolate pocky on hand.

"Asuka and Chitose, just like you asked!" Kirika crossed her arms and smiled proudly, totally oblivious to the glare she was attracting from Yuuri's direction.

"Thank you, Kirika, that will do," said Oriko, giving her a fond pat on the shoulder. "Asuka-san, Chitose-san, I apologize for-"

"Is _onee-chan_ all right?" The small green-haired girl interrupted her, tugging at her dress. "You didn't see anything bad happen to her, did you, Mikuni-san?"

Only someone Yuma's age could get away with touching Oriko without permission… everyone else risked incurring Kirika's wrath. She knelt down and tried to look comforting. "I do not know, Chitose-san." Addressing her like that was needlessly formal even for Oriko, but Yuma had made it clear that she didn't want to be treated any differently from the rest of her comrades, just because she was the youngest of them. "I felt a great deal of pain and distress, and saw her and the others returning, that was all."

"That could mean _anything_ ," grumbled Yuuri, rubbing sleep out of her golden eyes. "Pain and distress aren't exactly news these days."

"We should be prepared regardless," said Oriko as she rose back up. "All we can do is-"

What they could do, the others never found out. The school's front doors blew open so hard that they slammed against the stone and mortar walls with a titanic _crash_ that made Yuma shriek and Kirika fall flat onto her backside. Looking something like a red-haired stormcloud, in stomped Kyoko Sakura. The girl's raging temper couldn't disguise her sorry state. Puffy and bloodshot eyes ringed with shadow stared out from beneath her bangs, and her face was thin, pale, and filthy with mountain soil. Her favorite old hooded jacket was torn in a dozen places and stained brown with dried blood. Yuma ran to her with a shout of relief and concern, but Kyoko simply shoved her roughly aside without a word.

Oriko tried and failed to hide her surprise. "Sakura-san, are you all right? What happened? Where is-"

The sole of one of Kyoko's boots flapped against the tile floor as she made a beeline for Oriko, curled her hands into fists, and delivered a savage right hook to the older girl's jaw.

" _Oriko-sama!_ " Kirika howled as her beloved crumpled to the floor. She twitched spastically as two competing sets of instincts raged inside her: one part of her clearly wanted to tend to Oriko, the other part wanted to tear Kyoko limb from limb.

The latter part won out. In a flash she had Kyoko by the throat and was lifting her off the floor. "You little _cunt_ ," Kirika spat, her eyes flashing with rage. "How dare you…! How _dare_ you touch my Oriko-sama with your filthy hands!"

Kyoko didn't look at her, didn't even try to pry her assailant's hands loose from her neck. She just hung limply, the clenching of her fists the only sign that she was even conscious.

Yuma was screaming, Yuuri was already transforming into her battle costume, and pandemonium seemed about to break loose in the hall when Oriko's voice rang out, with enough volume to catch everyone's attention: " _Stop!_ "

Kirika's grip loosened. "Oriko-sama, are you okay? Does it hurt? Asuka, get your ass over there!"

"I will be fine," said Oriko, gingerly touching the livid red mark on her face, which was already bruising. "Let her go, Kirika."

"But Oriko-sama, she _hi_ _t_ you! This dirty whore deserves to die for-"

"Kirika," said Oriko, boring into her with her gaze and making it quite clear there was to be no argument. "Let. Her. Go."

With extreme reluctance, Kirika let the redhead fall. Kyoko remained on the floor for only a second before picking herself up and storming off. Yuma shouted her name and followed after her, barely keeping up with her strides.

"What the hell _happened?!_ " said a baffled Yuuri to their backs as the two retreated. "I knew she had an awful temper, but I've never seen her like that before…"

"I think we are about to receive an answer," said Oriko, turning to the open doors. "Misaki-san, Maki-san, welcome back."

The two Pleiades Saints looked like they had fared somewhat better than Kyoko, but only to the degree that neither of them were dirty or bloodstained. Both girls looked completely exhausted, and were holding each other up for support… Umika Misaki's glasses were spotted with tear marks, and her companion Kaoru Maki, usually bright and optimistic even in the darkest circumstances, wore a haunted, shocked expression, as if she had seen some terrible accident.

Oriko had already surmised the answer to her next question. She asked them anyway: "Where is Tomoe-san?"

Kaoru cringed and closed her eyes. "Tomoe's dead."

Oriko shuddered as Kirika helped her to her feet for the second time that night. She and Tomoe were not friends; at best, one could say they were strangers united by circumstance, forced to work together. However, it sometimes seemed that every Puella Magi from Mitakihara and the surrounding areas had something good to say about Mami-san. Mami-san was kind, Mami-san was gentle, Mami-san conducted herself in battle with a cool grace that was almost angelic. Mami-san took other girls under her wing and taught them to use their abilities to their fullest extent. Mami-san was an inspiration to dozens of others. Mami-san made tea and sweets for the tired and the injured. Mami-san cried harder than anyone when Tsukasa Hiiragi died, cried for poor Kazumi when she had fallen… she even cried for Kagami, who had transformed into the Demon that had taken Kazumi's life, along with those of so many others.

Mami Tomoe was dead. Oriko's vision had once again proven accurate; on the outside she let her face fall, but inside she once again cursed her power. She licked blood from her lips and asked the question that she knew she must. "Was it a Demon?"

Umika shook her head. "She… she died because of a Demon, but…" Clinging tighter to Kaoru, she shivered and took a breath. "… but the Demon didn't kill her."

Oriko looked from Umika to Kirika to Yuuri, then down the long hallway, the floor of which now bore a series of dirty boot prints. She tried her hardest to make sense of that information, but the answer wouldn't come. "Then how…?"

Kaoru spoke up again. Her voice was low and hoarse. "It was… it was Sakura. Sakura killed her."

**END OF PART ONE  
**


	2. Depression

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyoko returns to the apartment she shared with her lover and has a confrontation with Homura.
> 
> What happened to Mami Tomoe? Her last mission with Kyoko began almost two weeks before, in the forests surrounding Mount Fuji...

**STARS ABOVE SIDE-STORY: My Sunshine**

**PART TWO: DEPRESSION  
**

**February 2012**

**Mitakihara**

Kyoko couldn't taste her food.

Food was more than a means of survival, it was a comfort, occasionally even a luxury for the girl who never quite forgot the long nights when her late father hadn't been able to afford dinner for the family. The small mountain of brightly-colored packages surrounding her included all her favorites: melon bread, taiyaki, odango, instant cup ramen, gummy candy, freeze-dried ice cream bars, and of course, chocolate pocky. Discarded wrappers were quickly building up in piles around her. She was attacking the food as if she had a personal grudge against it, her teeth gnashing at one thing after another… but she couldn't taste any of it. It all turned to ashes in her mouth.

Just coming back to the apartment they had shared had been like a knife to the heart. It was silent and empty and it still smelled like her, like fragrant black tea and floral shampoo and cake mix. She had made it less than ten steps through the door before she collapsed and broke down again. By the time she stopped and regained control of herself, it was growing light outside… morning was coming, not that morning looked much different from night anymore, thanks to the great Demon's rampage. Weak and exhausted, Kyoko had dragged herself to the pantry and pulled out everything she could reach that didn't need to be cooked. She hauled it all into a corner and sat down there, and there she had stayed for the last few hours, eating mechanically and tasting nothing.

The front door creaked open, pushed by a small hand. The blue eyes that peered through the crack were wide with fright and concern. " _Onee-chan?_ "

"Go 'way," Kyoko snarled around a mouthful of something she couldn't identify; she wasn't even bothering to look at it.

Yuma stayed where she was. "I thought I'd find you here. Mikuni-san says you don't have to-"

Kyoko swallowed and reached for the next package. "I don't give a rat's ass what Mikuni says. I'm staying here."

"B-But _onee-chan_ , I'm trying to tell you, she said you-"

" _Fuck off!_ " Curling her fingers around the heaviest thing she could find, Kyoko threw it at the door with all her might. It turned out to be a very hard-skinned apple; Yuma shrieked and fled as it rebounded off the wooden frame with enough force to leave a dent.

Kyoko heard the little girl's rapid footsteps and the faint sound of sobbing from outside. A pang of guilt echoed through her, and she thought about getting up and going after her… Within three seconds, she had decided against it. _Whatever, I don't care._ She sagged back against the wall, laying her head against her knees. _Fuck her, fuck Mikuni, fuck everyone._ Her appetite had disappeared; now she felt faintly sick to her stomach.

"Was that really necessary?"

Her head snapped up. Homura Akemi was now standing in the middle of the room as if she owned the place. Of course Kyoko hadn't heard or seen her come in; the girl had turned pulling a Batman into an art form. These days she was more apt than ever to disappear in the middle of a conversation… she had been like that ever since Kagami's death and transformation. Not that she was all that easy to speak with before, but now talking to her was something like talking to a wall: you got nothing but cold, stony indifference. "You," said Kyoko flatly. "What the hell are _you_ doing here?"

"I was with Chitose. It wasn't safe for her to come alone."

"What, you think a Demon's gonna show up _now?_ " Kyoko scoffed. "The whole damn town's all but empty, Akemi. No people, no despair to feed on."

"It wasn't Demons I was concerned about." A pause. "Though you seem to be exhibiting enough negative emotions to feed dozens of them at the moment."

"Well, fuck you too," she said, hanging her head again. "If you don't have anything useful to say, get out."

Cloth rustled as Homura knelt down on the floor. "I heard what happened. You did the right thing."

Kyoko's breath hissed through her clenched teeth. "Shut up."

"You saved her from the hell of living the rest of her life that way. It was an act of mercy."

"I said _shut up._ "

"I know how you must be feeling-"

Abruptly Kyoko was on her feet, a small shower of crumbs falling from her jacket. Her eyes blazed with something very close to hatred as the words exploded from her. " _Bullshit!_ Don't just come in here and spout that crap at me! You think you know how I feel?! You don't feel _anything!_ Ever since the Demon… hell, even _before_ the Demon, you were nothing but a-" She stopped, struggling for a word that was hurtful enough. "… a _robot._ You're a fucking robot, trying to copy people's feelings because you don't have any of your own!" Her voice quaked with fury as she jabbed an accusing finger at Homura. "So don't fucking come in here and tell me you know how I feel! Don't you _dare_ act like… like you feel sorry, like you know what it's like! You don't know me, Akemi! You don't know me, you didn't know Mami, you didn't know Sayaka, and you didn't know Kagami Hiiragi either!"

Homura stood up, her pale face unmoving, but with something that might have been a glimmer of pain in her violet eyes… though it could have been a trick of the light. They faced each other for a long time before she spoke. "Perhaps you're right. Perhaps I don't know you, Kyoko Sakura."

"You're damn right you don't. Now _get out._ "

It was then that Homura fixed her with a stare that bored deep into her, piercing to her very soul. For just an instant, something broke through all of Kyoko's rage and sorrow and self-loathing and connected with her, something she could almost but not quite identify, like the fragment of a half-remembered dream… it made her shiver. "You don't know me either," said Homura softly. She turned on her heel, brushed back her long black hair, and left as suddenly as she had come.

Kyoko sank miserably back into the corner. _I'm so tired…_ She didn't feel like eating any more. Nor did she feel like getting up to lie down on the couch, and she didn't even want to look at the bed. So she decided she would sleep there on the floor, and laid herself down amid the piles of wrappers.

 _Please, God,_ she thought as she closed her eyes. _Don't let me dream. I don't want to dream.  
_

* * *

**Twelve Days Ago**

**Aokigahara Forest**

"Kyoko, wake up."

"Nnnngh." Kyoko was determined to ignore the familiar voice, but it was insistent.

"Please, Kyoko, you need to wake up now."

"Don't wanna." Grumbling, she tried to turn over in bed, but the blankets were strangely tight around her and refused to let her budge. "Leamme 'lone. S' still dark out. Too early to wake up."

"It's not dark because it's early, Kyoko. We're in trouble."

Grudgingly her eyes opened, and slowly her mind emerged from the fog of sleep. What she was seeing didn't make sense… it sure as hell wasn't their bedroom, and what was with the blankets? "Whuh… what the…"

"Good morning, sleepyhead," said the voice, faintly amused.

Kyoko shook herself. The fog remained; that hadn't been a normal sleep. "Muh…" Her mouth didn't want to work right, as if her lips and tongue had gone numb. "Muh-Mami? That you?"

"Yes, it's me. Do you remember anything?"

"Hang on…" It slowly was coming back to her, dispelling the fog.

The tendrils, that was it. They had discovered what Mother was doing melting holes in the ground throughout Japan… she was extending tendrils of herself deep into the earth's crust, as if spreading her roots. Those roots were erupting out of the ground in random places all over the country, blossoming like sick mockeries of flowers and disgorging not Spawn, but full-grown, fully-powered Demons… that was where her nickname had come from. The Puellae Magi were in serious danger of being overrun by sheer numbers well before they could even begin to plan to take Mother out.

Fortunately, one of Oriko's recent visions had given them a slight edge. She had predicted that two tendrils would soon erupt in the vicinity of Mount Fuji. If a team could go there and destroy the tendrils before they began birthing, they could have that much of an edge against her, that much more time to find a way to stop her.

So they had gone, Kyoko and Mami and Umika and Kaoru, splitting up into two pairs once they arrived. Mami had been less than thrilled about camping out in the woods for several days, but Kyoko had assured her they would be fine, that she was used to roughing it.

Several days had passed without any sign of activity, and then…

"The Spawn," said Kyoko, remembering with a shudder. Riding the edge of the usual miasma, there had been a tidal wave of bodies, sweeping through the forest and tearing trees up by the roots. Trying to hold the wave back, trying to fight it, had been pointless. Shivers ran the length of her spine as she recalled the sensation of thousands of Spawn crawling over her, burying her alive as she strained, reaching for Mami's hand, their fingertips almost touching before being torn away from each other…

"That's right," said Mami's voice. "They must have brought us to their Demon's Lair."

"Guess so. What _is_ this stuff, anyway?" For what Kyoko had mistaken for tight blankets was shrouding her entire body below her shoulders. The substance looked almost like cotton threads… but cotton threads didn't adhere tightly to people's bodies, cotton threads didn't glimmer in the faint light, and cotton threads sure as hell couldn't keep a Puella Magi bound if she didn't want to be. Kyoko thrashed and struggled to no avail, unable to so much as lift a finger. "Is this a spider web?! Ugh, _gross…_ I _hate_ spiders…"

"Don't struggle, you'll only entangle yourself further."

Reluctantly, Kyoko stopped… getting that sticky crap in her hair was _not_ something she wanted to experience. "I take it you already tried?"

"Mmm-hmm," said Mami's voice, resigned. "I attempted to tear free while you were sleeping, but either I don't have enough strength or the Demon has some way of blocking our magic…"

"Where are you, anyway?" Kyoko craned her neck as much as she was able, trying to see where her partner's voice was coming from. It hurt a bit; that was odd.

"I'm here, above you… or maybe below you, it's hard to tell."

Indeed it was; the structure of this Lair stung Kyoko's eyes if she tried to look at one place for too long. The space resembled the corridor of some rotting, long-forgotten hospital, twisted into a spiraling shape from end to end. It had the same ugly, off-green walls that Kyoko had sometimes seen when accompanying her father on visitations, but these were festooned with silk, mold, and moss, the pain peeling away in large flakes. An eye-crossing pattern of black and white tile was set into the floor, which complemented marble-speckled square panels in the ceiling. Dying electric lights flickered in their housings on the walls, their coils glowing with that sick orange color that indicated that the bulbs would soon die. And it had that peculiar hospital smell that always gave Kyoko the creeps… latex and antiseptic and sweat and blood.

Mami hung horizontally from one of the walls, wrapped tightly in her own cocoon directly above (or maybe below) Kyoko, wedged in the corner between the wall and the ceiling (or maybe the floor). Her curly golden pigtails were dangling past her ears, pointing straight down… or what Kyoko assumed was down. Incredibly, she still wore the same gentle smile that she always did. "Hello there," she said.

"Uh, hi," said Kyoko, smiling back despite herself. "So, the tendril we were after must have already crapped out a Demon… What's the plan? How are we getting out of this?"

"As of now, there isn't one." Mami sighed, and her features crinkled with faint lines of frustration. "Neither of us can free ourselves, much less fight it. Trying to struggle will only use up our energy faster. We simply have to wait, and hope that Misaki-san and Maki-san realize what happened to us."

"That could take _forever!_ " A sudden fit of panic and claustrophobia seized Kyoko, and she rocked violently in her web, twisting back and forth as much as she was able. "Dammit, I want out of this disgusting stuff, _now!_ " Her motions bounced her gently up and down in the network of threads, but otherwise did nothing.

Or at least, nothing immediate. A few seconds later, she heard the sounds… dozens, perhaps hundreds of legs scuttling over the walls… Another shiver passed through her. "Oh, _shit…_ "

"Stay calm, stay calm…" There was a tiny break in Mami's voice.

At first they were only visible as dark, rounded shapes on the twisting off-green walls. Kyoko initially thought their bodies were swollen, perhaps cancerous… then a few of them stepped into a pool of fading electric light. The Spawn were balls of white yarn, each with a wicked silver needle jammed through it, a needle that tapered down to the thickness of a pin. Eight hairy legs sprouted from each spherical body, at least one pair always twitching while the others moved. Those legs gave her the creeping horrors. " _Mami…_ "

"Try to stay calm," said the voice from above, or perhaps below.

Easier said than done. When three of them climbed onto Kyoko's cocooned body, she squirmed back and forth, trying to throw them off of her, damn becoming more entangled. "Get the hell _off_ me!" They advanced up her torso, coming close enough that she could almost count the number of hairs on each leg… and when they reached her shoulders, they stopped. "What… what are you…"

Two pairs of legs moved diligently, one on either side, tugging at the silk that bound her… they were exposing her Soul Gem for the third one, now standing on her chest and aiming its needle. Kyoko looked up frantically and shrieked. " _Mami!_ "

She could see Mami's ample chest rising and falling more rapidly than normal, and her eyes were shut tight. Those were her only outward signs of distress, and some part of Kyoko wondered how on earth she wasn't screaming… because one of the yarn-ball Spawn was clinging to the side of her head, bracing against her cheek with its legs as it grasped the flower-shaped hair decoration that held her own Soul Gem. "It'll be… all right, Kyoko," she whispered.

Kyoko's fear was forgotten in a rush of anger. " _Get off of her! Don't you touch Mami, you little-_ "

The needle pierced her gem and-

\- and she was climbing the cathedral's stone staircase. She thought she had heard a noise from upstairs. Rays of fading sunlight shone through the stained glass as she climbed, bathing her in reds and blues and greens. When she got to the top, she paused… someone had left the door to the loft ajar.

She frowned. Stupid Momo, she had probably been playing with her doll in there again… she must have forgotten to lock up after she was done. Kyoko moved to shut and latch the door.

Creak, creak. The noise was coming from inside. Was she still in there? Instead of closing it, Kyoko pushed it open, bewildered. She smelled something weird right away, a thick and coppery odor. Looking down, she saw a puddle of dark red paint spreading across the floor, the source of the smell. But paint didn't normally smell like that… her eyes slowly moved upward. The paint seemed thickest around a pile of rags sitting out in the middle of the floor, the rags were stained with it. It almost looked like an oversized version of Momo's doll, it even had hair… Next to the first rag pile was a second, much smaller one, and between them was Mama's only good cooking knife, lying on its side and stained from the puddle. Kyoko frowned at that; why would Momo bring the knife up here? It would get ruined with all this paint around, and Papa would scold her.

Creak, creak. There was that noise again. Something dark and heavy was hanging from the loft's highest rafter. It was wearing Papa's good shoes, they were dangling several inches above the floor. Slowly Kyoko's eyes moved up, and up-

_No._

\- and saw the white collar crushed in an embrace of heavy rope -

_No, please, I don't want to remember…_

\- and above that, slowly rotating into her sight, was a bloated, purple face, its familiar lean and handsome features distorted –

The scream that tore itself from deep within Kyoko's body sent two of the Spawn stumbling backward. The third withdrew its needle from her Soul Gem and retreated as she screamed again, and again, and again, until her throat turned raw…

Hyperventilating, sweating freezing bullets, seeing nothing but that horrible face, Kyoko shook all over, trying to stop the frantic crawling of her skin. _It wasn't real,_ she told herself. _It was just a memory. Just a nightmare from a long time ago…_ _can't hurt you anymore…_ But that wasn't true. That memory hurt like searing white-hot fire whenever she recalled it, that was why she always kept it locked away in the back of her mind… but _how_ could it have-

Something wet fell upon her cheek. Kyoko looked up, and though it scraped her poor throat like sandpaper, she cried out her name: _"Mami!"_

Mami's amber eyes were wide, unblinking, staring at nothing. Tears were falling from her lashes. The Spawn had its needle buried to the hilt in her Soul Gem, and she was frozen with a look of horror and pain on her face, unable to fight back, unable to move…

" _You bastards!_ " Kyoko screamed hoarsely. Her silken prison shook as she fought savagely with her bonds, straining every muscle in her body. It might as well have been steel wrapped around her. Still she fought, and struggled, and screamed every curse she knew at the Spawn, for herself and for poor Mami… " _You sick bastards, get away from her! Leave her the fuck alone!_ _MAMI…!_ "

Finally, the creature's thin needle withdrew itself. The moment it did so, Mami's stiff body relaxed, and her eyes closed as she took a deep, shuddering breath.

" _Mami!_ " Kyoko's shout of relief was more like a dry croak. "Oh, thank God, Mami, I thought it had killed you…"

"I'm all-" Mami coughed. Her words were slurred a bit. "I'm all right," she finished. "It's okay, I'm all right. Don't cry, Kyoko."

"I-I'm not!" It was a lie, tears were streaming down her face. "I'm not crying, stupid, y-y-you're the one that was crying…"

"Was I?" She blinked her wet lashes. "I… I felt so sad for some reason, but I can't remember why…"

"D-doesn't matter," said Kyoko, heaving. If it had done the same thing to Mami that it had done to her, not remembering was a blessing. "We've gotta get out of here, before they come back!"

Mami smiled that gentle, angelic smile. "Don't worry. I'm sure Misaki-san or Sayaka will find us soon."

Kyoko froze. _Sayaka._ The name brought back another rush of memories. Stubborn, willful, Little-Miss-Fight-for-Justice Sayaka Miki, Kyoko's rival and total opposite, whom she had fought with more often than she could count. Poor Mami had had to stop them from killing each other at least a dozen times… but slowly, as they fought Demons side-by-side, they began to respect each other. That respect became a friendship that confused Mami to no end: they would trade vicious insults one moment, and share lunches and jokes the next. They would play video games long into the night, because Sayaka's competitive streak would never be satisfied until she had trounced Kyoko completely. Sayaka was loud-voiced and somewhat perverted, Sayaka made terrible grades in school, Sayaka had a hopeless crush on a violinist in her class, Sayaka threw herself at Demons like a madwoman, hacking away with her cutlasses with absolutely no technique or subtlety. Sayaka had been part of the team, Kyoko's sister-in-arms.

"Mami," she whispered, feeling very cold. "Sayaka's dead."

"Wh-what…?" Her eyes grew wide with horror. She shook her head back and forth. "That's not, that can't be true! When…?"

"Mami, it was almost a year ago," said Kyoko with growing dread. "She ran out of power and faded while we were fighting a Demon with Akemi… You were the one who told me what happened, about the Law of Cycles, don't you reme-"

She stopped, the realization hitting her like a blow to the stomach. "Oh no. God, no. Mami, the Spawn… it wasn't feeding on your Heart. It was feeding on your _memories…_ "

**END OF PART TWO  
**


	3. Anger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyoko Sakura has made her decision: she wants to die for what she was forced to do to Mami. The guilt is too much to bear.
> 
> As she wages her last, destructive battle, she recalls more of Mami's final days...

**STARS ABOVE SIDE-STORY: My Sunshine**

**PART THREE: ANGER**

**February 2012**

**Mitakihara**

She grinned around the pocky stick clenched in her teeth. It was not a happy grin. _Come on. Come on._

Standing all alone in the middle of the broken, shattered street, at sundown, with the fog just starting to roll in… it was perfect, Kyoko thought. The only thing missing was the Demons, but they would come. There weren't many left in Mitakihara, but they would come, attracted to her like moths to a lantern. She wondered if they could already smell her. _Come on, come on. I've got a nice, juicy Heart ready for you, all full of despair, just like you like it. Come on out._

This would be it, her final stand. And this was the perfect place, the perfect time for it.

Kyoko Sakura had made her decision. She was going to die tonight.

But damned if she wasn't going to go out fighting.

It was enough.

As the fog thickened into miasma they came shambling forward, forming a loose ring around her, moaning in their incomprehensible speech. Obviously they were confused; a Puella Magi, one of their mortal enemies, was simply standing there by herself, waiting for them. She hadn't even called forth her weapon yet. She couldn't blame them for hesitating. Stupid, mindless things, you could almost pity them.

Unless you knew what their kind had done to Mami Tomoe. Unless you knew what their kind had forced Kyoko to do to her...

She pushed the rest of her pocky stick into her mouth, chewed it up, swallowed, and smiled. A red flash leapt from her half-darkened Soul Gem and coalesced into her spear. Kyoko whirled the weapon in a deadly circle, then slammed the weighted end into the ground. "All right, fuckers," she whispered. The bones in her neck cracked as she tilted her head sharply back and forth, limbering herself up. "Let's dance."

* * *

**About Two Weeks Ago**

**Aokigahara Forest  
**

"… and… and so the hunter closes his eyes and says, 'Oh, God in Heaven, I repent for all my sins. Please, I beg of you, make this bear do the honorable Japanese thing.' So the bear, it skids to a stop, drops to its knees, claps its paws together, and says, ' _Itadakimasu!_ '"

If only for a moment, the Lair rang with their laughter. Mostly Kyoko's laughter, of course, but she could hear Mami's cute little giggle from above… or maybe below.

Mami shook her head as she regained her breath. "That's _terrible…_ "

"Y-Yeah," said Kyoko, grinning lopsidedly. "It's an old one, but one of my favorites. Can't remember where I heard it, though…" She sighed and tried to shrug, but the cocoon made it difficult. "Ah well. That's about all I can think of for now. You have any good jokes?"

"Oh no," said Mami. "I'm no good at telling jokes. You and Sayaka, though, you were always-"

"Yeah." Kyoko felt her happiness ebbing away at the mention of Sayaka's name. Mami knew now. She didn't remember the event itself, that was gone completely… but after crying for a long time, she had accepted that Sayaka wasn't coming for them, now or ever.

Kyoko couldn't understand what had happened. She and Mami had both been fed on, so why could she still remember finding the bodies of her family? It was a memory she would have been glad to be rid of, but it was still there at the forefront of her mind, with horrible clarity.

The only way to keep from focusing on it was by talking, distracting herself. So Kyoko cracked jokes, told stories, recalled the plots of movies or TV shows she had seen… anything to keep from thinking about that memory, or the hopelessness of their present situation. Mami was an extremely good listener, as always, and if she minded being a captive audience, she had the grace not to let it show.

When Kyoko's voice got tired, it was Mami's turn to talk. She didn't have quite as many words to say; perhaps she thought it wasn't ladylike to share every little thing that popped into her head, or perhaps she just wasn't as desperate to shut things out, as Kyoko was. Mami would talk about recipes she was planning, or battles she had fought before the two of them had met, or other Puellae Magi she had come across during her career.

The one subject they both avoided was family. Kyoko had a very good reason for doing so, of course, but she couldn't help wondering why Mami wouldn't go there. She knew that Mami had lost her parents in a car accident some time ago, but normally she would still mention them every now and again, just in passing. Perhaps it was simply Mami being Mami, tactfully trying to sidestep what she knew would bring that image back to Kyoko's mind.

A loud growl escaped the layers of cotton-silk over Kyoko's stomach. She glared down at it. "Aw, shut up." There was no way to tell how long it had been since her last meal out in the forest, but it had to have been at least half a day or so. Being hungry wasn't too much of an issue for Puellae Magi; in the same way that you could shut off pain, you could shut off hunger or thirst if necessary, at the cost of the magic it took to do so and the energy that the nourishment would normally provide. It took focus to sustain, though, and Kyoko had never been much good at that technique even in the best of circumstances. Besides, she enjoyed food too much to consciously deprive herself of it for long.

Mami sighed. "I'm sorry, Kyoko. When we get out of here, I'll make something special to celebrate."

"You'd better," said Kyoko, licking her lips, which were growing dry. "Maybe some of the lemon chiffon cake that we saw in that magazine a couple months ago…"

"You mean the one with the caramel and honey drizzle?"

"Mmm-hmm. And extra rosebuds on the icing. I like those."

"Simple girl, simple pleasures," chuckled Mami, shaking her head again. "You're going to rot your teeth one of these days, you know that?"

Kyoko grinned, trying to ignore another rumble from her belly. "Not me. I keep 'em clean with magic. Only takes a little bit each day."

"So _that's_ why your toothpaste lasts so long…!" Mami wrinkled her nose in mock disgust... or possibly real disgust, it was difficult to tell. "Really, Kyoko!"

"Hey, I still use it!" Her grin got wider, and considerably more lecherous. "Mostly when I want to make out with you…"

"Oh, stop." A faint blush colored Mami's cheeks. "It's not proper to talk of such things. And you really shouldn't waste your magic on things like that."

"Oh-ho? Says the girl who likes to use her ribbons on me in bed."

" _Kyoko!_ "

The web shook as Kyoko erupted into triumphant laughter. She _knew_ that would get her. "Face it, Mami, you're a kink! There's no hiding it from me, I just know you too well… you remember the first time we tried to-"

Mami's face was turning almost the same color as Kyoko's hair. "Not _that_ story again…"

"Oh c'mon," said Kyoko, egging her on. "We were on your couch, I was on top of you… I had my shirt off, and I was unhooking your bra…"

Despite her obvious embarrassment, Mami smiled. " _Trying_ to unhook my bra."

"Ha ha, shut up. I was nervous, and it was tough to even find the clasp in those huge mutant cow boobs of yours. But you remember, I finally got it, and we were just getting started…"

"… and that was when Akemi-san walked in," finished Mami, starting to chuckle.

Kyoko closed her eyes and savored the memory. "Poor girl, she just stared at us for, like, ten minutes, then turned right around and walked out without saying a word…"

"And then you fell off." _Now_ Mami was really laughing.

"Yeah, I fell off." Kyoko winced, but started giggling just the same… Mami was the only person who ever heard her giggle. "I had a hell of a bruise for the next week."

"Mmm, I know. I saw quite a lot of it." Her voice dropped, becoming low and sultry. "I became quite familiar with a few _other_ areas of your body that week as well…"

"Oh- _ho!_ " Kyoko beamed with triumph. "See? Totally a kink!"

"You're one to talk, you degenerate. Shame on you, corrupting a poor, innocent girl!"

Once again the twisted halls of the Lair echoed with laughter.

* * *

She didn't know how much later it was when Mami's face paled suddenly. "Mami? What is it, what's wrong?"

"I hear them," she whispered. Her expression remained calm, but Kyoko could see the fear in her eyes. "They're coming."

So they were. Kyoko resumed her fruitless struggling as they advanced across the twisting walls, a full dozen of them this time. "C'mon, c'mon! Try that shit again, I dare you!"

"Stay calm. Remember to conserve your… nnh… energy…" The blonde girl shuddered visibly as the first Spawn climbed onto her. Then another, and another, and another… It soon became apparent that they were ignoring Kyoko altogether. Every single one was heading straight for Mami's Soul Gem.

"Wh-what the hell…" Kyoko sputtered. "What're you _doing?!_ Leave her alone, you idiots! I'm down _here!_ "

"Kyoko, don't… You have to-" Her words devolved into a very brief, strangled scream as three needles sank into the gem's surface. Mami's eyes went wide, her expression froze, she stopped breathing…

" _Mami!_ Goddammit, _leave her alone!_ Come on, Mami, you've gotta fight it, you've gotta wake up! _MAMI…!_ "

* * *

**Mitakihara**

The fifteenth Demon screamed as its skull caved in, collapsed by the blunt end of the spear. Kyoko was standing on its body, drenched head to toe in orange blood. She lifted the spear again and brought the weighted end crashing down into what was left. It usually took more than the loss of a head to kill one of them… this was one of the tougher ones, thankfully. "Come on, come on! Is that really it? You're barely putting up a fight!" A wild gleam danced in her eyes as she slammed her weapon down a third time, then a fourth. She could feel it; the faint sensation of acid was churning in her belly. Her Soul Gem was near its limit, it wouldn't be long now. Soon enough, it would either be shattered in battle or fade away when she expended all her power. Kyoko didn't care which.

"You're not even going to second stage, this isn't even a _challenge!_ " The Demon's thin white hands were flailing, trying blindly to score Kyoko with the cutting beams of light that lanced from its fingertips. She leaned easily out of the way, caught one of the arms, and squeezed, very slowly, crushing the bones underneath the pale flesh into powder. More blood oozed out from between her fingers. Tossing the ruined arm aside, she went back to work on the Demon's head, still using the blunt end of the spear. This trash didn't _deserve_ to die by the blade. Its cries were little but wet gurgling noises now, its movements were slowing to a stop. The blows started jangling up Kyoko's arms as the blunt bored through the Demon's flesh entirely and reached the street below, clanging off the asphalt. Still she struck, until most of the body was little but a mound of torn and mangled flesh.

She threw her head back and laughed joylessly at the ever-present clouds that had stolen the sky, tasting bitter fluid as it ran into her open mouth. Kyoko licked her lips and screamed, "Well?! Is that it? I can still go, I can still fight! _Give me more! Give me all you've got!_ "

And the Demons answered her challenge with angry groans as they filed into the miasma. Somewhere around two dozen of them this time… more than enough to finish her off. It looked like every Demon left in Mitakihara was converging on this spot.

Coolly she hopped off the broken body of her victim and gripped her spear with both hands. It was enough. _Perfect. Any minute now._

A thunderclap split the air. For a moment Kyoko thought that another storm was coming… Mother's disruption of the weather meant that they were prone to spring up without warning. Then she felt something, an instant too late. "Wh-"

Thick black cords erupted out of the asphalt all around her. Before she could react, they had seized her, constricting tight, pinning her arms to her sides. Kyoko screamed blue murder and pulled against the cords, recognizing the technique, knowing what was about to happen… " _NO! Goddammit, NO!_ "

Another, much louder peal of thunder echoed off the abandoned buildings as a pillar of lightning gathered just a few steps in front of Kyoko. The figure that stepped out of the pillar was dressed like an old-fashioned noblewoman from the European military: a dark beret, a long-sleeved burgundy officer's jacket with a medal pinned on the breast, white leggings, and thigh-high boots. The remnants of the lightning caught and glinted in the glass monocle she wore over her right eye. Her hair was short and snowy white, a color which suited her cold demeanor and the near-permanent scowl she wore. Without a word or a glance backward at Kyoko, Saki Asami drew the riding crop that she wore at her side. A snap of her wrist unraveled it, transforming it into an impossibly long whip that coiled at her feet…

" _Don't you dare!_ " roared Kyoko, struggling harder. " _This is my fight, Asami! Stay out of it, do you hear me?!_ "

Her words went unheeded. The whip danced like a snake at a charmer's whim, trailing arcs of electricity as it tore effortlessly through the ranks of Demons. Its passage left little behind but ash. Saki was taking them all down without the slightest display of emotion, in a display of the steely precision that was her hallmark as leader of the Pleiades Saints. Demon after Demon fell in a smoking heap and burnt away from the inside out, until all were gone and the two girls were alone. The miasma began to thin and dissipate.

Calmly, Saki walked to what was left of the closest Demon, leaned over, and plucked something from the body. Making a sharp turn on her heel, she stomped back to Kyoko. Clutched in her fingers was a small, translucent black cube, rammed through with a wicked spindle.

It shouldn't have been possible for Kyoko to get any angrier… but what was possible didn't concern her right now. "Get away!" Spittle flew from her lips. " _Get the fuck away from me, Asami! I don't want it!_ " She strained against the cords until she felt her bones creak… and then howled with pain as they sent a powerful current through her body.

Undaunted, Saki approached her helpless prey, held out her hand, and touched the Curse Seed to Kyoko's Soul Gem. A warm, white light appeared at the point of contact… and the darkness from the gem lifted up and sank into the little black cube. In seconds, Kyoko's Soul Gem was clear and fiery red once more. Kyoko's powers were replenished, her gem was pure.

Only then did the cords release her, as Saki's whip shrank and retracted back into its smaller form. Immediately Kyoko picked up her fallen spear and hefted it for a killing blow…

 _Crack._ The tress of the riding crop lashed across her face and split her cheek open. Too stunned to continue her charge, Kyoko reached up to her cheek, gaping at the other girl in astonishment.

"You _idiot_ ," said Saki, her voice trembling with the effort of repressing her anger. "How dare you… How dare you do something so utterly stupid?"

The shock wore off quickly. "That does it," snarled Kyoko, dropping her spear and clenching her fists. "You wanna go, cunt? _Come on!_ I'm not part of your cute little bicycle club! Go ahead! I don't care if it's you or a Demon that kills me! _Come on!_ "

"No," said Saki, folding her hands neatly behind her back.

"' _No?!_ '" The redhead stamped her foot. "Whaddya _mean_ , 'no?!'"

"I'm not going to expend my precious energy by fighting you, Sakura," said Saki. "I'm taking you back to Shirome, where you'll be monitored to ensure you _never_ attempt something like this again. Do you understand me?"

"And what makes you think I'm going with you, huh?"

"Simply put," said Saki, "if you don't go with me willingly, I'm going to bind you again and put electricity through you until you're too incoherent to do anything but drool."

The threat didn't faze her in the least. "No way, no how. You think you can drag me back to that rat's nest?" Kyoko spat on the ground in disgust. "I don't give a flying fuck about the war or Mikuni's plans anymore. Count me out."

There were a few seconds of stony silence between them before Saki spoke again. When she did, her face was no less severe, but her voice was just a bit softer. "Do you think Tomoe-san would have approved of that attitude?"

Rage boiled up inside Kyoko again, livid and festering, burning like magma in her veins. " _Don't_ ," she hissed through gritted teeth. "Don't you _dare_ say her name! You don't know what it's like! You don't have any idea what kind of _hell_ I've been through losing her!"

"Idiot," said Saki again… and to Kyoko's disbelief, her eyes started to glisten with tears. "You think you're the only one who's lost someone they love…?" And then she rushed forward, throwing her arms around Kyoko and embracing her.

"A-Asami…?" Totally confused, Kyoko just stood there, making no attempt to return the hug. She dearly wanted to get away, to be alone with her thoughts, but Saki was holding on too tight… Something about this was so wrong, so completely other from the Saki Asami that Kyoko knew, that it frightened her.

"Y-You stupid fool," said Saki, her words stinging with grief. "I was there, remember? We both were, when M-Mother… when she took Kazumi away…"

Kyoko remembered. There had been no time to move. The body had dropped to the floor, and there had been a blast of searing, hellish light… and her next recollection was waking up in the rubble of the hotel, to the sound of someone screaming the name " _Kazumi_ " over and over. She hadn't recognized the voice then… "Th-that… that was you…? You were-"

"I loved her," whispered Saki. A few droplets fell onto Kyoko's bare shoulder. "I loved her, and losing her… it hurts so much, more than anyone can understand… "

Kyoko wanted to try comfort her, she truly did, but any words of comfort would be empty, meaningless. "I think I understand," she said, gently patting Saki's back. "But you don't, Asami. You're gonna hate me for saying this, but Kazumi was… lucky." She lowered her head, shadows gathering on her face. "She went out quick. The Demon that took Mami from me took her slowly, bit by bit… and it made me watch…"

* * *

**About Two Weeks Ago**

**Aokigahara Forest  
**

"Mami." Her voice was cracking; Kyoko had screamed herself hoarse some minutes ago. The Spawn were gone long since gone, but Mami still wasn't waking up… She just hung there limply, her eyes half-lidded. "C'mon, Mami, this isn't funny… You gotta wake up. Please."

There was no answer. Mami's breathing was faint and shallow.

" _Please,_ Mami!" She wanted so dearly to reach for her. If only she could touch Mami's face again, surely that would work… but the cocoon held strong. The gap between them might as well have been miles across. All Kyoko could do was beg and plead, praying that she heard. "I know you're still there! You can't go, you can't leave me! Please don't leave me…" Then, a wild idea struck her, an impossible hope. There was still one thing to try, one thing that never failed to get a rise out of her. Sandpaper scraped Kyoko's throat as she swallowed heavily, took a breath, then said as loudly as she could manage, "Wake up, Sunshine!"

Mami stirred and blinked, very slowly. "Don't… call me that."

Kyoko almost wept with relief. "God _dammit_ , Mami, you have to quit scaring me like that!"

"Don't call me Sunshine," said Mami, frowning. She _hated_ that nickname… Kyoko had called her that once just to be playful, and it had put her in an uncharacteristically bad mood for the better part of a week.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Kyoko smiled, and her eyes began to sting with grateful tears. "It was the only thing I could think of… Are you okay? You still remember where were are, right?"

It took her a while, longer than it should have taken. "In… in a Demon's Lair. Mount Fuji," said Mami. Her speech was halting, as if she had to search for the words before she spoke them.

"That's right. We're somewhere up Shit Creek, without a paddle." Kyoko chuckled weakly.

"Language, Kyoko," said Mami with a grimace. She sounded a bit stronger.

"Yeah, yeah." Kyoko shuddered and let out a breath that it felt like she had been holding for an hour or more. She didn't know how much more of this strain she could take… There was only one way to deal with it, by talking to her, but try as she might she couldn't think of anything else to say. "Mami…" She paused, and selected the first thing that came to mind. "Why do you hate being called 'Sunshine' so much?"

Mami's gaze moved beyond Kyoko, to somewhere far away. "I've never told you?"

"No, you haven't. I think it's a cute name, but it always pisses you off so much…"

She sighed. "Have you ever heard the song, 'You Are My Sunshine'? It's in English, so you might not know it…"

"Sounds familiar," said Kyoko, racking her brains. "Yeah, I think so." She sang a few bars, her voice wavering, clumsily sounding out the words as she remembered them. " _'You are my sunshine, my only sunshine… You make me happy…'"_

"Yes, that's it." Mami smiled, but her face was lined with pain. "My mother… she used to go to America on business when I was very young. Mother loved music, and someone taught that song to her on one of her travels. It was one of her favorites… She would sometimes call me 'Sunshine', because of my hair. She said it always reminded her of the color of the sun."

Kyoko swallowed, feeling guilt claw at her belly. "Oh God, Mami, I'm sorry…"

"There was one time," whispered Mami, closing her eyes. "I had a very bad fever, and was bedridden. I… I don't remember much, but Mother… she came into my room at night, when I couldn't sleep… She laid a towel on my forehead… and she sang to me to sleep. 'You Are My Sunshine'. I can still hear her voice…" Then, suddenly, as if someone had flipped a switch, Mami burst into tears…

" _Mami!_ " Kyoko squirmed frantically in her prison. "Mami, it's gonna be okay, I swear! What is it, what's the matter?!"

Choking out the words between sobs, Mami answered. "I'm scared, Kyoko… I'm scared, I don't want to forget any more…"

"They won't." The lie was like a poisoned dagger to Kyoko's heart. "They won't, I promise. Somehow, we'll kill the Demon, and we'll get your memories back, Mami. I swear we will."

"Kyoko," she whispered, her amber eyes wide and glistening, more afraid than Kyoko had ever seen her. "It's my mother. I… I can hear her voice, her singing… but I can't-"

"Can't what? What is it, what's wrong?"

"I can't remember… what she looked like…"

**END OF PART THREE**


	4. Bargaining and Acceptance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Mami's deterioration continues, Kyoko is faced with a terrible choice: prolong her lover's suffering, or end her misery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to Sierra.

**STARS ABOVE SIDE-STORY: My Sunshine**

**PART FOUR: BARGAINING AND ACCEPTANCE**

**February 2012**

**Mitakihara**

Laughing shadows danced over the faces of the four girls gathered around the fire. Each of them was wrapped in a blanket, and huddled close to the flames for warmth. It was snowing outside; the flurries started without warning earlier that afternoon and quickly blanketed the school grounds in thick carpets of white. Everything was muffled and quiet… the only sounds were the intermittent pops and crackles from the firewood as it burned.

"I only got fed on once," said Kyoko softly without looking up at the other girls. The flames reflecting in her scarlet eyes made for an eerie effect. There was no emotion in her voice, only flat, dull weariness. "Just once, that first time, in the whole two weeks we were trapped there. Every other time, the Demon and its Spawn fed on Mami. I still don't know why."

" _Onee-chan_ …" Cautiously, Yuma moved her hand and rested it on Kyoko's leg. Any other girl her age would be afraid of her adopted sister after her outburst the other day. Not Yuma, Yuma had been through far worse. At nine years old, Yuma Chitose had already seen and felt more suffering than most children could bear. There were still cigarette burns on her forehead underneath her bangs, old scars that not even her magic could heal. She was the youngest Puella Magi in Japan, but strangely one of the most mature as well. That duality didn't sit well with some people, people who couldn't understand why such a little girl could talk and think and fight like an adult, and offer solace and comfort in situations that other girls her age couldn't comprehend. Healing spells were her specialty, but there was more to it than that. Normally, her very presence could heal people without even using magic… but Kyoko was beyond that. Kyoko was feeling the pain of wounds that cut far deeper than any physical injury.

"It doesn't make sense," said Saki, wrinkling her nose. Her glasses slid down a bit; she readjusted them with one finger. Once again, she was all business. Her rare show of emotion from earlier had been over in minutes. She never made much time to grieve anymore… the way she saw it, the next tragedy could strike at any moment, so she needed to be quick and efficient with their emotions. It was a cold way of living life; sometimes, it was as if the twin traumas of losing Kazumi and fighting Mother had taken from the part of her that was still human, and turned her into something more like an Incubator. "You were both viable targets, and Demons aren't smart enough to have preference for one person over another," she said, blunt and focused.

"We don't know that," said Homura on the other side of the fire as she brushed her hair back. "You've noticed, haven't you, Asami? Fighting her Spawn has been more difficult lately. The Mother could be… improving them, somehow." Homura's hand still hurt from her altercation with Kyoko, and it was a pain that she didn't want to go away. When Saki brought her back, and told her what her friend had tried to do to herself, her famous composure broke for the first time since… since _then_ , and she dealt a blow to Kyoko that nearly dislocated the readhead's jaw. That surprised her. Slipping back into her old habits, keeping the pain locked away under a mask of indifference… much as she hated it, it was second nature by now. Hearing that Kyoko had attempted suicide should have prompted no more than an icy glare, or maybe a few choice, cutting words in her direction. A punch to the face? That was _Kyoko's_ style, not hers. She wondered what was wrong with her.

"Doesn't matter _why_ it did it, it just did it," said Kyoko, not bothering to look at either of them. "It took Mami little by little, and there wasn't anything I could do but watch…"

* * *

**Aokigahara Forest**

"Sakura-san…" Mami's voice trembled with apprehension.

Kyoko cringed, no longer caring if Mami could see it or not. It was a measure of how many of her memories had been stolen; it had taken three months of them living together before Mami started calling her by her given name, and that was almost a year ago. " _Kyoko._ Call me Kyoko."

"I'm… I'm sorry, Sakura-san… Kyoko." She paused. "I'm sorry. I've done that before, haven't I?"

Kyoko's mouth twitched. "Only a few times. Don't worry about it." That was a lie; it was going on two dozen times now that Kyoko had had to remind her. Maybe more, she had lost count.

"Kyoko, when we get out of here…"

"Yeah?"

"What's going to happen to us?"

That was an odd question. "What do you mean?"

"Where… where will we go? Home?"

Kyoko looked away. A knife twisted in her stomach. "Yeah. We'll go home. Don't worry." _Oh God, how long is this gonna go on? We may not even_ have _a home to go back to if we don't get out of here. Dammit, Demon, just hurry up and finish us off already, don't just keep torturing us…_

A rattling noise filled the hallways of the Lair. Above her (Kyoko had decided a few days ago to think of Mami as "above" her, just to try to preserve some sense of orientation), Mami's face contorted, and her silk prison shook visibly. "Sakura-san…!"

 _Oh no._ The knife turned in a brutal corkscrew, and she thrashed so hard in her own cocoon that she felt her muscles pull and start to tear. _No! I didn't mean it, God, I swear! Not again! Please, I didn't mean it!_ "Mami," she said, keeping her voice even through a supreme act of will. "Listen. Whatever you do, don't move, don't even twitch. I'm… I'm gonna try to get its attention. I think if I really concentrate hard, I can hit it with a power bolt or something…"

"Sakura-san, no, you can't!"

She flashed a grin upward. "It's _Kyoko_ , and better me than you again. Just sit tight, maybe I can damage it… Here it comes!"

The source of the rattling soon became apparent as the Demon made its first appearance to them. It was a huge, old-fashioned, broken-down spinning wheel, perched precariously on rickety ball-jointed spider legs barely thick enough to support it, so that it teetered first to one side and then to another as if it were intoxicated. The thing trailed dozens of wisps of shining thread behind it as it moved, all stuck to the wooden parts of its body that had chipped or splintered. Its wheel wobbled unsteadily on its axis but continued spinning its silk ceaselessly as it lurched down the hall toward the helpless Puellae Magi. " _Oio nosihc?_ " it said in the incomprehensible Demon speech. Its voice was high, thin and quavering, as unbalanced as its body. " _Ono se hciu loci mm idero vafr ep!_ "

"All right," whispered Kyoko, gritting her teeth. "Come on, come on. Get closer. I dare you, asshole…"

Mami began to cry. That scared Kyoko more than any Demon could… this wasn't Mami's usual crying. It was the helpless, messy, undignified crying of a lost and terrified child. It meant she was even farther gone than Kyoko thought. _Gotta make this count…!_ Beads of sweat broke out on her brow as she strained, gathering all her remaining power to resist the dampening effect of the Demon's Lair, putting everything into this one shot. Her Soul Gem began to shine through its growing tarnish, brighter and brighter…

The Demon clattered nearer, climbing the twisting walls. Just like its Spawn, it was ignoring Kyoko. It was headed straight for Mami, who was shivering and sobbing in her web. An immense rusty needle emerged from the creature's wooden body, one that tapered down to a hair's thinness at the point, positioning its rickety legs over her body like a cage.

"Oh no you don't! _Eat this!_ " Kyoko turned her gathered power loose, then sagged limply as it exploded from her gem. It was a wild, erratic shot, there was no way to control it. A crooked spear of red light shot upwards like a fork of lightning, shattering two of the spokes of the Demon's wheel. Its legs buckled, and there was a burst of orange blood…

_Come on, come on! Please, God, please, I'm begging you. Please… Please, do anything to me, just leave Mami alone!_

… and the Demon shambled upright, slowly, slowly adjusted its position, and rammed the point of its needle straight into Mami's Soul Gem.

This time Mami didn't go silent. This time her voice mingled with Kyoko's as they both screamed in agony.

**An Hour Later**

Her voice was going hoarse, but she kept talking. For Mami's sake, she couldn't stop. "C'mon. Wake up, Sunshine. This ain't the time for napping. You hear me, Mami? You're gonna miss everything. Next time that thing comes around, I'm gonna blast it so hard… You hear me?"

There was no answer, no sound save for the steady dripping of tears from Mami's wide-open, staring eyes.

Kyoko's words were husky with the strain of holding herself together. "It's gonna be fine, Mami. Muh-Maybe you should just flash your huge mutant cow boobs at that thing, you think that would work?"

Again, no answer.

"Mami, please. Please wake up, Sunshine…"

Finally, Mami stirred and blinked. Her eyes were still unfocused, but slowly clearing. Her lips moved, and she said something Kyoko couldn't hear.

"Didn't quite catch that," said Kyoko, allowing herself to breathe again. "What did you say?"

Mami giggled and smiled drowsily. "'Sunshine'. It's nice… that's a nice name. You're funny, _nee-chan_ …"

* * *

**Mitakihara**

Kyoko stopped and drew her knees up against her forehead. She thought it would be impossible to cry anymore, that her whole lifetime's worth of tears was used up, but something kept pulling them out. "After that…" she choked out, as Yuma wrapped her small arms around her waist and Homura slid close to put a hand on her shoulder. Even Saki put in a hesitant motion toward her. "After that, her mind just started… breaking… she just couldn't take it anymore… God, I can't…"

"You don't have to go on if you don't want to," said Homura softly.

The red-haired girl gave a great shudder. "I-"

* * *

**Aokigahara Forest**

"Scared," said Mami. "Tired… scared... _Nee-chan_ … wanna go home…"

The weight of despair was crushing Kyoko, forcing the air from her lungs, denying her the strength to struggle with her bonds any more. All she could do was smile wearily and tell another lie. "Shh. It's gonna be okay. It'll be over soon." That last one was true, at least. She knew that Mami's Soul Gem couldn't withstand being pierced many more times, even given the thinness of the Demon's needles. Her own gem was faded to the color of dried blood, its glow almost extinguished. Soon, the Law of Cycles would enact, and whatever strange force spirited away dying Puellae Magi would come for her. Then, at last, the torture would be over.

"Over? Go… home…?" said Mami. Her words were more slurred than ever.

"Yeah." She only had the energy to lift one corner of her mouth. "We'll go home."

"See…" Mami's face crinkled as she searched what was left of her mind for the word she wanted.

"See what? What do you want to see?"

"See… Mama…?"

Kyoko didn't think the knife could stab her any deeper, but she was wrong. She still wasn't past the point where its pain would cease to affect her. "Yes," she whispered, nodding and squeezing out a few fresh tears. "Yes, you'll get to see your Mama."

A smile lit Mami's face that was as innocent and angelic as it was empty. "Mama," she said with a happy sigh. "Mama."

"J-Just be a good girl and try not to cry, and you'll… you'll see Mama really soon, okay?"

Far-off rattling down the twisting hallway announced that the Demon was coming to feed again.

Mami made a whimpering sound, and her lower lip began to tremble. Kyoko braced herself for more bawling, but then the older girl bit her lip and put on a face that suggested she was trying to be brave… for her sake. Or maybe for the sake of her poor mother, whose death she had forgotten.

Kyoko saw the first of the rickety wooden legs come into view down the hall and closed her eyes, unable to bear even the thought of watching it happen again.

* * *

**Mitakihara**

"That was the last time," said Kyoko, her voice smaller and quieter than ever. She curled herself up tighter, drawing the blanket over her shoulders. "After that, she couldn't even…"

* * *

**Aokigahara Forest**

After a while, though she hated herself for thinking it, the formless cooing noises that Mami made instead of talking became… oddly relaxing. Almost hypnotic. Hypnotic… sleeping was now her only escape from the nightmare. Whenever she managed to catch a few minutes rest, it was a struggle just to wake up again, but when she was awake, Kyoko talked to her. She talked about whatever would come to mind, no matter what it was: fairy tales, their Demon hunts, even verses from the Bible that she recalled hearing in her father's church. She kept coming back to the 23rd Psalm… Mami seemed to like it, or at least she smiled more often when Kyoko recited it.

 _"_ … _shall follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever,"_ she finished.

" _Ahn,_ " said Mami.

"Yeah, I know," said Kyoko. "I like that one too. Guess it wouldn't hurt to start it again, huh? Would you like that?"

" _Ha_ _h,_ " said Mami.

"Okay. _The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to-_ "

Her recitation was interrupted as the Lair's foundations shook. Kyoko and Mami quivered in their silken prisons, and dust rained from the ceiling. "What the hell…?"

Then, a new noise. It took Kyoko a moment to recognize it: the sound of running footsteps. Human footsteps. _Oh God, please. Please tell me this is real, that I haven't gone crazy. Please…_ "H-Hey!" she shouted. Her throat felt like someone was scraping it with sandpaper, but she tried again, louder this time. " _Hey…! Somebody, anybody! Please, get us out of here!_ "

And the owner of one set of footsteps shouted back: "Sakura-san! Sakura-san, is that you?"

"Yeah, me and Mami! Stay on your guard, don't get caught yourself!" Kyoko didn't care if it was a hallucination anymore. If it was one, if she was going crazy… well, then she would just embrace it. If it meant an end to this…

The two figures scaling the twisted hallway were working as a pair, as always: Umika Misaki with her flowing white and navy robes that were almost like a nun's habit, and Kaoru Maki in her skin-tight orange bodysuit. "What _happened?!_ " said Kaoru as they came nearer. "We've been looking for you guys for the last ten days!"

"It doesn't matter…" Kyoko heaved a few dry sobs of relief. "Doesn't matter, tell you later…"

Umika threw out an arm as Kaoru almost touched one of the anchoring strands. "Don't touch it, that's gossamer… spider silk. No wonder you couldn't get loose."

"Ugh, gross." Kaoru wrinkled her nose. Then she blinked and looked up. "Is that you, Tomoe-san? How are we gonna get up there to-"

" _Guh,_ " said Mami happily.

"T-Tomoe-san?" Kaoru's face paled as she began to realize that something was very, very wrong. "Tomoe-san, it's me, it's Kaoru! Good God, what has it been _doing_ to her?!"

A sudden spark of hope lit up inside Kyoko's heart. Misaki was here. Misaki specialized in memory magic, magic that could affect humans and Demons alike. She could barely contain her glee as she grinned genuinely for the first time in a week, so happy she was almost vibrating in her web. "Misaki… Misaki, you still have that spell, right? _Ix File?_ " At Umika's confused nod, she continued. "So… so you can fix her! You can read the Demon and give Mami back her memories!"

"I…" Umika started. "I'm not sure that I-"

"'Course you can, that's your specialty, isn't it? I've seen you do it! Hurry up, dammit, cut me loose and give me a Curse Seed!"

"I will, I will, just hold still!" Umika passed a hand over her book, morphing it into weapon form. The handsome leather covers spread and sharpened to become a halberd's blades, connected by a long staff. Working carefully, she lengthened the staff to reach Kyoko, slashing strategically through the web until it collapsed around them.

The redhead let out a grunt as she fell and hit the floor/wall hard, but it was the best pain she ever felt… with a few more precise cuts she was free, standing on her own two feet again. One Curse Seed from Umika's travel bag and she felt her powers return, brimming, overflowing. It took only a thought to summon her spear, and in moments she was helping Umika cut through the threads holding Mami far above them. She took a running jump, catching the cocoon as it fell, and wept with joy as she nuzzled the cheek of her friend, her partner, her lover… "It's gonna be okay now, Mami. God, it's gonna be okay… we just have to read the Demon, that's all…"

Mami only smiled in reply.

That awful rattle filled the hall again. Somehow, the Demon knew... When it appeared, its movements were no longer jerky and erratic; it moved with the precision of an enraged hunter watching its prey escape an impossible trap.

"Here it comes!" shouted Kyoko, hefting her spear. "Bind it first, then we'll read it!"

Umika pushed up her glasses and grinned. "I think I know just which binding spell to use…"

"Go ahead," said Kyoko, regaining some of her bluster. "Just be sure you leave enough space to let me have a crack at it." Her grip on the shaft tightened. "I owe this one, big time!"

The Demon screeched and hollered and clattered as it rushed towards them, its wheel spinning so fast that its remaining spokes became a blur. It raised two of its legs to attack…

" _Tocca Spirale!_ " cried Umika.

"Fuck and _YES…!_ " Kyoko said, pumping her fist in the air, unable to contain herself. Of course she recognized it; that spell was one of Mami's trademark moves. As they watched, a pair of navy blue ribbons seized the Demon's upraised legs, keeping them from falling. More ribbons sprouted from every surface of the twisted hallway, wrapping around it and forming an intricate latticework net that the spider was far too big and clumsy to escape. It thrashed hopelessly in its bindings and let out a series of ear-splitting screeches.

"See how you like it, motherfucker!" Kyoko laughed and flipped Mami's tormentor the bird for good measure. She knew she was being childish, but who cared?

" _Ix File_ ", chanted Umika. Her halberd had morphed back into book form. She held it open underneath the trapped Demon and stared upward, the lenses of her glasses turning white and opaque as she worked her magic.

Kyoko wasn't watching. She was hugging and kissing Mami, now freed from her own bindings, not caring that the other two girls were right there. "Just hold on," she said. "Just hold on a little longer."

Mami giggled and fluttered her eyelashes.

"We're gonna go home," said Kyoko, "we're gonna go home and you're gonna make us the biggest chocolate cake anybody's ever seen, and we're gonna eat 'til we pass out, and then I'm gonna take you to bed and-"

"Sakura-san…?" said Umika.

"Heh heh, sorry, got a little carried away."

"What's up, Umika-chan?" said Kaoru, coming to her partner's side. Then she froze as she looked at the pages…

There was a long pause before Umika spoke. "Sakura-san, there's… there's nothing there."

The brightness inside Kyoko dimmed at those words. "Wha… what…"

"I'm… I'm so sorry, Sakura-san…" Umika's voice quivered. "This Demon… it… it didn't take her memories…"

"What the hell do you mean, Misaki, I _watched_ it take them!"

"No, I mean…" The younger girl swallowed. "It didn't _steal_ Tomoe-san's memories… it… it ate them. They're gone."

Mami giggled again and batted at a piece of loose silk.

Kyoko went cold as all her happiness of the last few minutes faded away. "Wh… what are you saying…?" she whispered, dreading the answer that she knew was coming.

"I can't… bring Mami back."

A dark, pitiless void opened up inside Kyoko. Somehow she knew, with perfect clarity, that had she not used a Curse Seed moments before, her Soul Gem would have gone black at that moment. She looked down at Mami, who gazed back up at her with that lovely smile… the lovely smile that was empty and without recognition.

"No," said Kyoko. "No, that's not fair. No…"

"Sakura-san, I'm sorry, we-" Kaoru began, clutching Umika's arm for support.

"You're _sorry?!_ You're fucking _sorry?!_ " Kyoko gripped her spear so hard that whiteness spread from her knuckles to the rest of her hands. "Fuck you, fuck _everything…_ _I'll show you what's gonna be fucking SORRY…!_ "

The harsh tones and volume of her voice upset Mami, and she began to cry.

Kyoko screamed with frenzied wrath, extended the spear shaft to its full length, and vaulted to where the Demon lay bound. Howling at the top of her lungs like a rabid animal, she plunged the spear's blade into it, over and over again, as if she could find Mami's memories and dig them out of its body. Its blood was spraying her in the face, hot and bitter, but she didn't stop. Her weapon mangled every part of the creature that she could reach, and when all around her was torn to pieces, she summoned another spear, and another, and another, all working at once. Kyoko's scream continued on long past the point where it should have faded out, as the Demon's body collapsed into a mutilated pile of flesh and spinters, the Lair began to collapse, but still she hacked at it, until finally her maddened eyes recognized something within the corpse: the Anima Daemon, the very core of a Demon's being, a black, shriveled, pathetic piece of burnt metal that was its sad excuse for a soul. For it, she threw aside her spear. For it, she seized it with her bare hands, stared at it for only a moment, then snapped the thing in half with all the strength her rage and hatred could give her.

When she came to her senses, she was lying on her back in the middle of the forest. Fog was rolling around her in silver clouds, she felt dew on her back, and somewhere a frog was singing a peeping trill… it was morning, just before dawn. With a great weariness clinging to her like leaden chains, she staggered to her feet and took a step, then another, supporting herself with her spear. Kyoko used it like a cane as she very slowly made her way up a mossy hill, following the sounds of hushed voices.

All three were there as she crested the hill: Umika and Kaoru, their heads bent low, their eyes red and puffy, and Mami, propped up against a tree, her amber eyes vacant, smiling once again. "Mami," said Kyoko in a sort of croak.

Mami looked up at her and beamed. " _Ahn!_ "

Kaoru was shivering and rubbing her arms. "Sakura-san…"

"It's dead," said Kyoko, unable to return Mami's smile. She was so tired…

"What are we going to do, Sakura-san?" said Umika. "Tomoe-san… she can't even walk, we had to c-carry her out of the Lair when you-"

"Stop." Kyoko held up a hand. "Don't wanna hear it."

"Sakura-san, we can't just leave her like this, if she'll never…" Kaoru paused, searching for the words. "If she'll never be _right…_ "

"You think I don't know that?" The venom in her voice made Kaoru shrink back. "You think I haven't fucking realized by now what I have to do, Maki?"

Umika hesitantly laid a hand on her shoulder. "Sakura-san. If… if you want, I can do it. I can-"

"No." Kyoko swatted her hand away. "Don't touch her. Just get the fuck out and leave us alone."

"Are you sure you want us to-"

"Maki, if you say one more word, I'm slitting your throat," hissed Kyoko. "Go. I'll catch up when…" The concept was too much to think of; she sagged, only keeping herself upright by gripping the spear for all its worth. "… when it's done."

The two Pleiades looked at each other and nodded, then walked into the rolling clouds of fog, holding each other's hands.

Kyoko listened until she could no longer hear their footsteps recede, then went to Mami's side at the tree. "Hey, Mami." Carefully, she eased her lover's head into her lap, then smiled down at her, stroking her hair. Her Soul Gem glittered brightly; Umika or Kaoru must have refreshed it. "Comfy?"

" _Ahn_ …" said Mami. She raised a hand, reaching for something, her fingers clutching at empty air.

"What is it, Mami?"

" _Ahn_ ," she said again. " _Ah… ah…_ "

"What is it, what are you trying to say?"

" _A…ka…_ ," she said. Red.

"Yeah," said Kyoko. "That's right. Here you go." She reached back and pulled a lock of her scarlet ponytail forward.

Delighted, Mami took it in her hands and rubbed it against her cheek. " _Aka_ ," she said again. " _Aka._ "

She started crying then, gently rocking Mami back and forth, letting the poor girl play with her hair while she wept for what was lost. "I'm sorry, Mami. I'm so sorry." She repeated those words as a litany. "I'm so sorry."

Mami blinked as she felt a teardrop fall on her forehead, then reached up to touch it, confused. " _A… ka…?_ "

Kyoko sniffled and wiped her eyes. "No, it's okay. I'm fine. Do you…" She swallowed. "Do you… want me to sing to you? Before… before you go? Would you like that?"

It could have been just another random movement of her head, but Kyoko swore that Mami nodded.

"Okay," she whispered. "Okay." She was singing the song before she knew it, before she even had time to think about it. " _Y-You are my suh-sunshine…_ " Her voice was husky and almost breaking, but it didn't matter. All that mattered was treasuring this moment. " _M-My only s-sunshine… You make me huh-happy…_ "

Mami gently closed her eyes and listened.

" _... wh-when skies are gray… You'll never nuh-know, dear…_ "

Her throat tightened. She couldn't force the next line out. Kyoko wrapped her arms around Mami, leaned over her, kissed her forehead, and started crying all over again, her shoulders shaking with great heaving sobs.

Mami titled her head to the side. Her face fell, and her fingertips reached up to caress Kyoko's cheek. " _A… ka…?_ "

Somehow, with that sweet, gentle touch, Kyoko found it in herself to go on, to finish her last gift to Mami. "… _h-how m-much I l-love you…"_

That, at least, made her smile again. She leaned back and closed her eyes.

Kyoko raised her spear in her shaking hand, trying to hold the point steady over Mami's Soul Gem. Just one strike. It would be quick, maybe even painless for her. All she had to do was let it drop.

"… _p-please d-don't t-take… my s-sunshine… away._ "

The spear fell. Mami Tomoe let out a small sigh and was gone.

* * *

**Mitakihara**

Three of the four girls around the fire were in tears. Only Homura remained stoic, but no one could see her face, as she was hugging Kyoko with all her might, resting her chin on the other girl's shoulder. "You were brave," she whispered. "You were braver than you know. It's what she would have wanted."

"A-Akemi…" Kyoko choked.

"It's all right," said Homura. "She's at peace now. She doesn't have to suffer anymore. You set her free."

"Then why…" Kyoko shook in her arms. "Why… do I feel…"

"Because you loved her, _onee-chan_ ," said Yuma from her other side. As always, the small girl spoke with a wisdom that belied her age. She patted Kyoko's knee and nodded. "You loved her so much that you did the right thing for her, even though it hurt you so badly."

"Y-Yuma…"

Saki's glasses were off, and she was dabbing at her eyes with a handkerchief. "I… I didn't know Tomoe-san well. But…" She sniffled and clutched at her blanket. "But Kazumi did. She… she idolized Tomoe-san, always wanted to be just like her… I think…" She paused. "I think Kazumi loved her too, saw her like… like a sister…" That word was too much for her. Saki's composure cracked, and she huddled in her blanket as she cried.

"We'll honor her," said Homura firmly, releasing Kyoko to look her in the eyes. "We'll honor her by continuing the fight. It's what she would have wanted."

Shakily, Kyoko nodded. "Y-You're right. Th-thanks."

Homura gazed into the fire. Her expression, as always, was unreadable. "She was always noble. She fought not for the sake of herself or her wish, but to protect people… In that way, she set an example for us all…" One pale hand reached up to touch the red ribbon that she always wore. "We will remember Mami Tomoe. Now and always."

Kyoko nodded again and dried her eyes on her blanket. "Yeah. Always."

* * *

**Eighteen Months Later**

_The raging wind howled around them both, whipping at their hair, threatening to blow them off their feet… if they weren't flattened first by the huge pieces of debris that the storm was kicking up._

_"Where's Kanna?" said Homura Akemi, shielding her eyes with one arm._

_"Kanna got hit, it's gonna take her a while before she can get back up!" Kyoko reached out and grabbed the other girl's arm. "Akemi, I think… I think it's gotta be you!"_

_Homura gazed up at the writhing dark shape above them that was the size of several city blocks, the shape that had razed their world. Vittoria, the Mother. "I-"_

_"Look," shouted Kyoko as the wind picked up, "I know. I know, okay? I know how hard it is. But somebody has to finish her off… for Mami."_

_The voicing of that name dispelled her last seeds of doubt. Homura nodded. "You're right… for Mami. Set up a barrier and stay behind it, no matter what happens. Protect the others."_

_Kyoko smirked. "Whoever's_ left _, you mean?"_

_"Yes." As always, the humor, black as it was, flew over Homura's head. "Don't worry, Kyoko. I'll end it." The tattered dark wings erupted from her back, and her bow appeared in her hands in a violet flash. "For Mami."_

_"For Mami! Now go!"_

* * *

_"_ Onee-chan! _"_

_Kyoko's transformation came undone, her battle costume dissolved away. She hurt… she felt a kind of pain she had almost forgotten about, deep within her. Puellae Magi could block out pain, suppress it with their magic. After a while, doing so became almost second nature. But this was an entirely different kind of pain, a lurching, growing, acidic darkness. She groaned, uncomprehending, unable to lift herself off the ground. "Wh-what…"_

_Then she felt the weight in the palm of her hand, managed to turn her head to look at it… and she understood. Her Soul Gem sat there, no longer bright and shining. Its interior swirled with black clouds, drowning out its normal ruby color. Her face turned pale._

_At once, the others were beside her, Yuma clutching at her other hand almost hard enough to break it, pouring more and more healing magic into her body as she screamed her name. Oriko fell to her knees, shaking her head in denial, unable to speak. And Homura just stood there, her stoic face finally cracking… she was crying. Kyoko couldn't remember the last time she had- No, wait. She remembered. She remembered all too well. Two years ago, before the nightmare that was Vittoria, when they had lost Sayaka… the night when Mami had told her the truth._

_"H-hey," she said, forcing a smile. "Knock it off, guys. You're gonna ruin the moment."_

_"Sakura, you fool!" Oriko's voice was raised in sorrow and anger. That was another rare event… usually she was almost as unflappable as Homura. "Why didn't you tell us you were low on power? We could have done something, we could have-"_

_"D-didn't know myself until just now," she admitted, smiling genuinely. "Pretty stupid, huh…?"_

_Homura went cold. She knew without a shadow of a doubt that had just given their last Curse Seed to Kyubey. Now it was too late…_

_"Just hold on,_ onee-chan, _please hold on!" Yuma could barely speak through her tears. Her hands trembled around Kyoko's as she cast another wave of power, but it did nothing._

_"C'mon, brat…" Kyoko laughed weakly. "Don't wear… yourself out. It's just my time, is all… nothing you can do."_

_"That's not true! Yuma can fix you, Yuma can-" She broke off in mid-sentence as Oriko laid a hand on her shoulder._

_"Hey, Homura." The red-haired girl shuddered, feeling strangely light… that feeling of acid inside her was still there, but far away somehow. "Don't worry about it. You didn't know… so it's fine. I did… what I had to do. That's enough."_

_"Kyoko…" Homura whispered. This couldn't be happening again. Not now, when they had finally won… Memories flashed unbidden into her mind, of another person lying there, inexplicably smiling while their Soul Gem darkened. "No…"_

_"Yuma-chan?" With the little strength she had left, Kyoko squeezed the younger girl's hands. "You're gonna have to… be strong now. Homura and Oriko and Nico… each of them will be your_ onee-chan _now, so be a good girl and… listen to them, okay?"_

_Yuma nodded, holding on to Kyoko for dear life. "I… I will."_

_Grinning, Kyoko closed her eyes. "Thanks, Yuma-chan… you were a great little sister, you know…?" Then she looked back and smiled at Oriko, at Homura, at-_

_She blinked. There was another girl standing there beside Homura. Not Nico, Nico never dressed in pink… This was a Puella Magi Kyoko had never seen before. Her costume was pink and red and white, very frilly, like something from one of those old fairy tales, spotless despite the ruin all around them. She had short pink hair tied up in pigtails, and her smile was so kind and gentle that Kyoko felt a warmer just looking at it. "Who…?" she whispered, confused. There couldn't be a new Puella Magi here, that wasn't possible. And why didn't the others seem to notice her?_

_The new girl stepped forward and knelt down next to Kyoko. She was still smiling at her as if she was an old friend. Her hand extended, clad in a dainty little white glove, and hovered over Kyoko's Soul Gem. The black clouds inside of the jewel gathered up and escaped from it, restoring it to its former glory… and then the Soul Gem itself simply faded away like a dream. The new girl leaned over her, took Kyoko's face in her hands, and placed a soft, feather-light kiss on her forehead…_

Ah, _thought Kyoko._ So that's it.

_At first she thought that she was dreaming… but if it was a dream, it was a dream with more warmth and clarity than she had ever felt. It was like she was gently floating, rocking from side to side, but at the same time going up, drifting higher and higher… There was someone ahead of her next to her guide, the new girl whose name she now remembered, whose purpose she now understood. Hovering next to that girl was someone she hadn't seen in a long time, bathed in radiance and smiling down at her, extending a hand in welcome, her blonde curling pigtails falling over her shoulders…_

_Kyoko grinned, took her hand, and hugged the other girl tightly to herself. Home at last._

" _The other night, dear_

_As I lay sleeping_

_I dreamed I held you in my arms_

_When I awoke, dear_

_I was mistaken_

_So I hung my head and cried_

_You are my sunshine_

_My only sunshine_

_You make me happy_

_When skies are gray_

_You'll never know, dear_

_How much I love you_

_Please don't take my sunshine away…"_

_\- Jimmie Davis and Charles Mitchell, 1940_

**THE END**


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